It’s both strange and funny to think back on what you were doing at this point in your life 1, 2, even 10 years ago. I feel so old saying ” 10 years ago” but it happens almost daily these days.
If I had only known half the stuff then, that I know now, I can’t imagine what my life would be like. It’s easy to look back and think “wow, what a knucklehead move” or ” what a smart choice that was”. Often, in the moment I find that I just do it, live on the wild side and go with my gut. Up to this point in my life I can say I have minimal regrets. Even though I live with very few regrets I sometimes look back and just really take in what’s transpired in my life. Time for a “time hop”!!!
Six years ago, at this point, I had an infant, was making my second attempt at real estate and was getting my ass handed to me in the 3rd degree. I was newly engaged and thought that life was how it was gonna be forever.
Three years ago, I found myself as a heavily pregnant single mom with a 1 year old. The thought of 2 kids under 2 would literally drown me every night. I would sit up and just think “what are we gonna do?”. I had moved, trusted no one, changed my # and shut pretty much everyone out. I had one very close friend, at the time, and if it wasn’t for her and her family calling me, stopping by and inviting me to their house EVERY DAY that period would have been even more of a nightmare. Unfortunately, at the time I didn’t know suffering was a choice. I didn’t know any better. At some point I chose to let it go and from that moment I felt I was a brand new and improved person. I started going to church again and found my love for Joyce Meyers. Side note: if you ever see my finger tattoo it represents that journey 🙂 I’m so thankful for that situation and everything I learned from it. I cannot even think of all of the people who have come to me, called me, emailed me in Mom’s groups or stopped me in random places with similar stories. I have been able to give a helping hand or words of encouragement to sooooo many people because I lived it!!! It’s funny how that happens.
Two years ago I was planning a wedding … Yes a wedding – lol. I was excited to finally have that “perfect life”. It was literally set up for me. We’d be taken care of, content and secure. Luckily, I remembered that I don’t like being ” content” and quickly reminded myself that I have the choice to change my mind. Did I receive warm thoughts or wishes during that time??? Nope, but once again I chose what I felt was right. That situation once again made me step back and look at everyone around me. Who was honestly there? Who wanted to see us succeed and be happy? Those answers helped me to chose my next few steps in the process of getting my life together and truly figure out who was good to join my journey.
Finally… this time last year. Our first full year as a blended family. For those of you who are “step parents”( I personally hate that word ) – you know the struggle. Having 3 children is a lot … Having 5 is even more lol. I never thought I’d have 10 cats! I never thought I’d ride a lawn mower. I never thought I’d have a baby and a teenager under one roof. These are all things I would have NEVER imagined. Baking cookies on a Sunday with 5 kids? …. Never! Explaining that babies can come from ” your place” or your stomach? … Never! None of these things ever crossed my mind just 1 year ago!!!
Just to sum it all up and bring it on in. Looking back can be insightful. There will be hard times that are difficult to remember . Those times are important! When you feel like you aren’t smart enough, strong enough or brave enough to face whatever your current life brings, looking back to when you made it through ” the impossible” will lift you to a place of ” I can, I have and I will”. 🙂 🙂